Every time she does this, Paula is reassured when she still knows the answer, and she is further reassured when she is able to understand that her answer is correct. Then she breathes a sigh of relief. Paula and I worked hard to try to restore her memory. We tested remedies offered by the doctors and kept the one that helped her to answer that one simple question correctly with confidence. The remedy worked in fits and starts at first, but worked better and better over time….for about 10-15 years until she was completely restored to her former baseline intellect and memory. That is how we discovered a treatment that worked, albeit very slowly, but still-it worked!
We were able to save Paula! And she has been well for decades now. Slow breathing and all.
Paula is very very grateful for each day that she has a normally working memory and she is grateful to have a quick way to test it. Paula understands that her knowledge memory can disappear overnight and with it will go her insight; she will not be aware that it’s gone. Since she isn’t sure if she will still be herself every “next” day, she tests herself, every morning. And if something goes awry, I will know…because she will no longer know what to tell me. This blog is a testimony to her memory, in case she looses it , once more and needs our help.
No one knows better than Paula how fragile memory is. She still shudders at the memory [which she oddly has now, but did not then] of not being able to remember for more than a few seconds. This inability to remember has got to be the worse kind of disability. Without your thoughts, your ability to remember, you become completely disabled and you cannot even remember that!
It is important for others not to loose hope, should this happen to you, because they may find ways to bring you back, like we did Paula.
We think that there might be better, more efficient, and faster remedies in the future; but only if we treat this loss of mind and memory as potentially reversible. This is what we did for Paula.
We understood that her debilitating loss of memory and mind was a spontaneously reversible attack, because of Dr Emile Kraepelin‘s careful scientific documentation in his book called Manic Depressive Insanity. Chapter one tells us that these attacks are completely reversible [at least, the first attack, no matter how long it lasts] and Chapter three tells us about sympathetic activation and metabolic dysfunction due to injury causing too slow ventilation at rest [motor part of breathing] requiring treatment.
Treatment helping acid base balance in the blood, despite slow breathing, brings back memory, bring backs mind, brings back Paula, and can bring back others.
This was Dr Kraepelin’s hope.